eye watching

Love? Obsession? A fine line.

According to the U.S. Department of Justice, stalking is a pattern of repeated and unwanted attention, harassment, contact, or any other course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear.

While these singers are great at their craft, they overachieve with their predatory affection. None of them (in the songs) shy away from their shady shenanigans. Let’s take a walk down stalker lane.

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See how #ItAllWentWrong, coming to theaters this Fall.

All Around The World, Lisa Stansfield
I’ll never give up looking for my baby. Boo, he ain’t checkin’ for you.

“All Around the World” topped r&b, pop and dance charts across the planet in 1990. It was eve-ry-where!

I don’t know why, why he’s gone away. Something about you lying, being the weakest one of all (sounds like cheating to me). Y’all had an argument. He rolled out. End of story? But I’ll find him, somewhere, somehow. Instead of just taking the L, you endlessly, globally pursue him. How did you make it around the world? Plane, train, automobile? He doesn’t wanna be found. Instead of looking for your babbbbbbbbbby, just say bye-bye-bye.

 

I’ll Be There, The Jackson 5
Don’t let the sweet sounds of a pre-pubescent Michael Jackson fool you, “I’ll Be There” is drippin’ with stalker-cult tendencies. Who has a coordinated team (replete with choreography and harmony) telling a woman, I’m gonna be a part of your life whether you like it or not? Dem Jacksons. Right out the gate, You and I must make a pact, *coughs* cult. Build my world and dreams around you. I ain’t got nothing to do with your freaky fantasies. You know I’ll keep holding on. LET ME GO! And the blatant pièce de résistance, Just look over your shoulders. WTF? Someone please call 911!

 

She’s Playing Hard to Get, Hi-Five
Hi-Five created an alternate universe from a woman saying “Hi”. She’s playing hard to get. She just won’t admit. That she likes me. She won’t admit it, because those feelings aren’t mutual sir. I bet she’s glad I’m readin’ her mind. You’re reading YOUR mind. This woman is minding her business.

You don’t have to say a word (playin’ hard)
But I still know how deep the feelings are you have for me
Your smile and the look in your eyes
Says more than any words you could ever think

She has basically uttered no words to you. That smile and look in her eyes…fear. Security!

Hi-Five – She’s Playing Hard to Get

Music video by Hi-Five performing She’s Playing Hard to Get. (C) 1992 Sony Music Entertainment

 

Hello, Lionel Richie
Lionel is a music legend. That just means he’s an O.G. in the harassment game. Professor Richie starts his lecture:

I’ve been alone with you inside my mind
And in my dreams I’ve kissed your lips a thousand times
I sometimes see you pass outside my door

It’s the visuals that really tell the stalker story. Just three years into the music video revolution, Lionel nails the prowler factor. He leers at “Laura” in acting, music, dance AND sculpture classes. He follows her in the hall, hovers behind her on the quad. When does he have time to actually teach? He calls her at home (when landline telephones existed) and sings, Hello. Is it me you’re looking for? AND THEN HANGS UP PHONE! The only reason this ends in a love connection is because Laura is literally blind and can’t see that Lionel has been ever-present in her course schedule.

 

Outside Your Door, Meshell Ndegeocello
Here I am waiting. Just waiting. Anticipating a chance to run into you.

While the songs aren’t ranked, clearly “Outside Your Door” tops the list. There isn’t a specific lyric. This entire song reads like a predator’s playbook. She fully embraces her stalker-nicity. Time, inclement weather, boundaries, reality mean nothing to her. Meshell has done all the work for me. There isn’t anything I can write to further illuminate her crazy. Witness for yourself:

Here I am waiting
Just waiting
Anticipating a chance to run into you
Sit here for hours
One day even sat through a rain shower
For just a glance
A chance to talk to you
You’re probably wondering how I even know you
For now you’re just my dream
When I wake I hope you talk to me
Here I sit outside your door, talk to me
Here I sit outside your door, talk to me
I’d be content just to sit here and talk to you
‘Cause in my dreams you love me and me only
The way you kiss and hold me
Love is what I search and search and search to find
But until then, I just dream for the meantime

I’ve added some bonus tracks in the playlist below. What stalker songs do you think should be on this list? Drop your ideas in the comments.

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lyricfancy uses music as a conduit to humorously discuss human nature. This article is in no way a personal judgment about the artist. We believe in creative expression.

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