Editor’s Note:  The headlines and (timelines) are filled with the extracurricular exploits of committed individuals (cough, cough Victor and Nicole). There seems to be more blatant interaction between the wife/fiancé/main boo and the side piece. I am reposting the lyric experiment that examines infidelity and all its messy glory.

Lyric
So, I called you…I wound up with your guy. When I don’t wanna be that girl.

Song & Artist
That Girl by Jennifer Nettles

Hypothesis
Mistresses aren’t really contacting the wife. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Analysis
Jennifer Nettles laments about her indiscretion with a committed man. Under the guise of I’m-looking-out-for-you, she kisses and tells his partner about the dalliance. The night began in an alley. Classy.

Is this the new normal, when the other woman (or man) discloses the affair to the significant other?

Lover, jump-off, side piece–all varying degrees of someone involved with a committed person. Mate poaching has taken place throughout history in just about every society on the planet.

The cheating landscape is ripe with future opportunities for spouses to hear from relationship outsiders considering:

  • Ashley Madison (the dating website for married people) saw a 344 percent spike in registrations on New Year’s Day 2014
  • Ride-or-die chicks adhering to the sports mistress code
  • Women who make a career out of being a paramour

What do Sandra Bullock, Gabrielle Union and YouTube user TheEbonieMarie have in common? They were all contacted by the side piece: Sandra by fax, Gabrielle through an open Internet letter, and Ebonie via phone. Some confessions were apologetic, others were antagonistic.

Other mistresses gone wild exploits:

  • Mashonda Dean (wife of music producer Swizz Beatz) heard from Alicia Keys via a little birdie aka Twitter
  • Elin Nordegren (wife of Tiger Woods) heard from Jaime Grubbs by way of an Extra TV interview
  • Marni Phillips (wife of ESPN analyst Steve Phillips) received a letter from intern Brooke Hundley

To add insult to injury, men purchase more expensive presents for their girlfriends than wives.

A California man gave his 26-year-old mistress an iPad and took her on a $2,500 ski vacation at a resort in Vail, Colorado for Christmas last year. His wife’s gift: an espresso machine.

It’s great to know men have their priorities in order.

Conclusion
Who wants to be THAT girl? There seems to be no shortage of chicks willing to reach out and touch, email, text, the wife. So aspirational.

Sources

Photo credit: Victor Bezrukov. Creative Commons License

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